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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”
# y) f3 ~* E" A2 t" L9 \5 u: i
7 j) u' S9 s$ X4 [& t6 h2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”* v/ G1 ]2 `) y+ L
! t- c( T/ `) G5 Y% ]* w" J5 q/ V男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”7 H _: W' Y d- s6 s! i' V
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3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。3 Y0 D) F0 u) s. J5 x9 Z8 W
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老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。
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女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。
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2 Q! ~) I. F0 |& a+ t笑死我了。。。8 f0 h" A" P7 m; ]% O5 V4 `& S
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4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，! O2 a& a1 C; f. O2 o5 \
/ k6 t. I1 d2 }' d6 N; s可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，
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- }4 q0 D- o' }: l8 L# G" e$ o$ G我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!
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7 q# u# G& t# a0 B+ a2 ^+ ?+ y她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!
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晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”
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8 b8 ~/ e. L! y1 o5 k. ?恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，
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& b- `/ w% v: c0 o& n' X' K就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”7 ]2 R5 p1 \; ^/ s8 i
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孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…
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5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，+ c9 X3 `. S) C$ [
( Z/ O! d; c- p. g1 ]3 [1 }我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！. s6 h6 m" r* E0 T- P
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一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。
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当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？! C" L- B4 R# v& i# k" S
0 s# E9 [) h V: Y我，无业闲人一个。3 a& Q% p- q0 s- U8 `
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女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？5 y/ u1 v- L d1 \# v. a; F& o
; U: a2 J- F+ y3 {0 H我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。
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女：滚她妈犊子，滚…
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当前离线
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