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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”# N( m! x$ d4 ^
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2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”
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男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”
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3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。
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老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。
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: @; _) h% O- L l" a( A女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。
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1 ^/ P% a7 U. R* y6 k8 k笑死我了。。。
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4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家， W' W. _& F$ L) s/ S$ q
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可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，
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: b, D5 o3 L4 u/ H我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!7 e) o6 d4 j1 F
/ s7 D& @6 G4 p! k0 g她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!: {0 k; }! v- Q7 q3 X8 @8 k
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晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”: z8 u6 r- z H& L
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恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，
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) ^! u6 O: x$ [' V) u2 u5 @就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”
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4 c9 u7 e8 a3 W1 f! l孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…
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: u8 F8 r% P$ x1 O% s; d/ ]5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，
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0 }/ _8 a5 a* I% D1 f/ _9 }- X, U我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！7 X$ B6 m8 K8 L
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一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。
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当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？
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我，无业闲人一个。5 H: E+ n9 M8 A }4 c, V
: l' O4 l+ q: Y- U5 q女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？
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7 Q' N0 m% y, t4 G. b+ O! n我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。9 _- u& Z0 _, ?
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女：滚她妈犊子，滚…* ~& E: ?! [8 r7 I6 ?1 m8 P
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当前离线
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